G R conundrum

[PaulaD]

Hi All,

Have just been in touch with someone on Genes Reunited who has got one of my rellies married to completely the wrong person. Now do I bother trying to tell them or do I just delete them from my contacts?
What would anyone else do?

Paula

[Billmalc]

Hi Paula

I think, as long as you can give them some proof e.g a transcript of the marriage cert, then it would be nice to tell them. I would prefer someone to tell me if I had the wrong info on my tree. I'm sure most people would feel the same way.

Bill

[emanday]

Hi All,

Have just been in touch with someone on Genes Reunited who has got one of my rellies married to completely the wrong person. Now do I bother trying to tell them or do I just delete them from my contacts?
What would anyone else do?

Not that I'd ever cast aspersions, but are you sure you are both "talking" about the same person? Are you sure your facts are the right ones? Is there any possibility that you are BOTH right about the same person, but someone has got their dates wrong (i.e. 2nd marriage or, hivvins forefend, an adultery).

Seriously, though, I had a similar situation, but just with an Irish birth year and location. Told the GR member even offered to send him the image of the church register, got a "LOL" back as a response, and he left it at that.
All you can do is tell them what you know and back it up with facts. The rest is up to them. You never know, you might end up with a whole new set of grateful rellies!

[LesleyB]

Hi Paula
I'd go with what the others have said- if it is the same person you are talking about, and you have proof, then let them know. They may be glad of it and delighted to see the document(s)...or they may not wish to know...but that is up to them!

I've certainly had experience of this, and the person in question, although proof has been put infront of them, has chosen to ignore it and seems to prefer the "alternative version" which I know to be utter drivel, (documents to support this statement!!) but there you go.... there's no pleasin' some folk, even when the truth is more interesting than the fiction.

I think we all have parts of our trees which we believe to be "true", either because we have done the research and have the evidence to support it, or because we think we do... it can come as quite a shock to find that part of it may not be as it seemed, and some folk seem to prefer the story they have created to the reality you may put before them.

Best wishes
Lesley

[StewL]

Lesley

I understand what you mean, when I first started this family history caper. I was completely on the wrong track with both my main lines. It was only some kind souls on the old SP DG that put me on the right track.

I have contact with a few folk overseas and two of them have had similar experiences when they tried to lead other folk on the right track. They just didnt want to know. Some want help and others are happy to carry on with the mythical lines they have found. Or dont want to know could be another reason, or they wont accept that they are wrong.

[wini]

Folks is strange!!!

If anyone can tell me I have gone down the wrong track, and I have done so, I am pleased to be corrected.
I am lucky that I have 2 cousins who have been immense help
I keep all the information of "maybe" and have found down the track there is a tie in some not.

wini

[PaulaD]

Thanks all for your suggestions.
I know I'm right on this one as I have marriage, death and birth certs for 3 kids to prove it.
Was tempted to ignore them but will show them my proof and see what happens.

Paula

[LesleyB]

Hi Paula
I think I'd be tempted to just let them know what you know, why you believe it to be so .....and just say that you are quite happy to give the references to support what you are saying, if they are interested & want to know more.

Put the ball back in their court. They will either be interested to follow up, and want to know more...or you may not hear from them again!!

Best of luck with it.
Lesley